A man came into my office
and asked me what he should do about his wife. He said he just left her and his
12-year-old daughter to be with his girlfriend full-time. His wife does not
care about him and is not filling his needs. She doesn't love him. On the other hand, his girlfriend
cares and gives him everything he wants. She is responsive to him, and even
anticipates his desires. She loves him; he feels loved with her. I explained that he was confronted with the biggest
decision of his life. If he went back and decided to love his wife and
daughter, giving to them instead of taking from them, he would grow up and
learn true Christian charity, or the pure love of Christ. But if he chose his
girlfriend, he would remain a dependent child.
There are three gifts of
the Spirit that go with us upon death: faith, hope, and charity, the last being
the greatest gift in the world.
And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the
greatest of these is charity.
(1
Corinthians 13:13)
He is being offered
charity. It is his choice. God is going to give him a free gift that will make
him into a Christian. He will be like Jesus. He will have all the blessings of
the gospel of Jesus Christ as Mormon explained:
...if a man be meek and lowly in heart, and confesses by the
power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, he must needs have charity;
for if he have not charity he is nothing; wherefore he must needs have charity.
And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up,
seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth
not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all
things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Wherefore, my beloved brethren,
if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore,
cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail—But
charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found
possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him. Wherefore, my
beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye
may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true
followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that
when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that
we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure. Amen.
(Moroni
7:44-48)
If he is meek, not using
his power to hurt anyone by leaving his wife and daughter, and lowly in heart, not putting himself above his
wife and daughter, then he will confess Christ with his decision, not with his
lips. The decision to sacrifice is confessing that Jesus is his Lord, because
the Holy Ghost tells him that the Christian thing to do is to sacrifice the
desires of the flesh, to die as to the things of the world, so he can be
resurrected into the light, the Spirit, and the ways of the Lord. If He chooses
to leave his wife, he is choosing the things of the flesh, and denying the
Spirit. This is open rebellion against the Lord, and he remains an enemy to
God.
For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the
fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings
of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint
through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive,
meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the
Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.
(Mosiah
3:19)
I know, I have been
there. I asked for a blessing but was offered a curse. A blessing builds up,
but a curse is anything that brings someone down to a lower level. My wife was
not responsive to me and was not fulfilling my needs. I asked the Lord to teach
me to love my wife, and I was offered another woman instead. She was perfect:
beautiful, French, wealthy, organized, good taste, intelligent -- everything I
could want in a woman of the world. She wanted me. She told me she wanted to
make love every day. She called me one night to examine her breasts, and
offered herself to me, right then, and anytime I wanted. At that point I had a
choice, to stay with a woman who was not interested in me or my needs, or to
take a woman who had everything and could give me what I wanted, but would
curse me to the world, preventing me from receiving the gift of charity.
The choice is given when
the blessing is available. “You can have this, or that, but not both.” One is
what I want from the world, the other is what I want in heaven. One is the
choice of taking upon myself the name of Christ, and the other is the choice to
remain a “natural man.” One is the way of the Spirit, the other is the way of
the flesh. One is a decision of freedom, the other is bondage; the world is a
prison. Jesus offers a way out, not in my speech, or in my study, or in
learning, or in knowledge, or in going to church, or in doing the outward
ordinances, but in the daily decisions of the flesh. I am given the choice to
follow Jesus Christ into the depths of humility, become submissive, and
sacrifice everything of the world, or to have the things I want, and remain in
bondage.
The Word of Wisdom
Food is a choice now more
than ever. Almost anyone in the world can eat a diet of kings, choosing delicious goodies over nourishing food. When the Lord
makes a covenant with His people, He gives them dietary guidelines. Many people
think that the forbidden foods are bad, and will hurt the body, as Peter when he
was told to eat the forbidden foods of the Law of Moses. The point of dietary
guidelines is mostly spiritual. It is a sign between God and His people. The
people can choose to eat whatever they want, the things of the world, or they
can follow the counsel of the Lord.
Part of this includes eating and drinking substances
to change feelings, effectively tying people to the world. A need is
created by using chemicals instead of the Spirit. The Holy Ghost is the
Comforter, and will comfort me in my sorrows without dulling my senses with
alcohol or other drugs. I would rather choose the Holy Ghost over any chemical in the world. I
don’t want caffeine to pretend to be awake during the day, I want to actually be
happy, awake, and alert. People take LSD and other hallucinogens to have fake
spiritual experiences. I want to have real experiences, not fake ones created
by chemicals.
This also includes
fasting. I want to eat. My body needs food. I desire it. I love food. I eat
good food. I love good food. The Lord gives me a choice, to fast, or not. I
fast, giving up what I want for a time, and then giving it to others. My fast
is for my spiritual benefit, but also provides a benefit in the world to
others. Love is making a sacrifice for the benefit of others. Giving up food is
hard, especially when it is everywhere. I can have it. It is right in front of
me. It looks and smells delicious, tasty, and filling. It will fill the need --
of the flesh.
I have the choice every day
whether to eat, or not. I am taught to eat for nourishment instead of taste,
but I like sugar, sweets, salt, fat, carbs, and highly refined and processed
foods. If I choose the lusts of the flesh, I may be unhealthy, but I will
surely be tied to the world.
...the devil... leadeth them by the neck with a flaxen cord,
until he bindeth them with his strong cords forever.
(2
Nephi 26:22)
Money
There are many decisions
every day that bring me to God, or to the other side. I am offered money to
lie. I can have money, and lots of it, if I am willing to lie, cheat, and steal
from others. In the practice of medicine, I offer patent drugs that offer no value
but take money from people. This is cheating and stealing. I tell people that
they can buy health from me, but I don’t have that to offer. I take their money
and give them nothing but problems in return. Statistically, people are more
likely to be hurt than helped by seeking medical attention. The death rate
always goes down when there are no doctors available. The drugs they provide
are counterproductive. Taking advantage of the ignorance and naiveté of another
is stealing. I am paid well to tell people what they want to hear: “you can be
healthy by taking a pill.” I’m selling a fantasy. It’s stealing.
The other option is to
provide a service for others. To give to others without asking in return. The
Lord offers this to me... and I am still trying to decide what to do. It’s hard
to leave what I have. I have built up so much!
Sometimes the offer of
money is not so obvious. I met a man who was offered a job that would pay a lot
more than his current job, but he would need to sacrifice time with his family.
He took the job, and his family suffered, so he quit and takes in less money so
he isn’t always traveling. This is not to say that every offer of money is a
curse, but rather that every individual must choose between the world and the
Lord.
Sabbath Day
The mark of the covenant
people is their observance of the Sabbath day. From the very beginning, the
creation of the earth, the Sabbath was instituted, where God rested from His
labors. This is not just something of the world that is only done while in mortality
on earth, but continues on forever. Those who say that they follow the Lord,
but don’t keep the Sabbath day holy are not of the covenant. This one is
universal.
Isaiah tells us about the
Sabbath, and how to keep it holy, by not doing what I want to do, but rather
doing the things of the Lord.
If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy
pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of the Lord,
honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine
own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words:
(Isaiah
58:13)
Keeping the Sabbath day
holy means doing things differently on His day. There are specific things to avoid:
·
“turn away thy foot” means not going where I
want to go.
·
“doing thy pleasure” or “finding thine own
pleasure” means not doing what I want to do.
·
“doing thine own ways” means doing the things
that I normally do.
·
“speaking thine own words” means saying things
that I want to say, or making myself heard.
There are also specific
things to do on the Sabbath:
·
“call the sabbath a delight” means finding joy
in Him.
·
“the holy of the Lord” means this day is set
apart from all other days to seek Him, His will, His thoughts and His ways.
·
“honorable” means a day that is not of the low
things of the world, but is filled with glory, and the things of the Lord.
·
“shalt honor him” means to pay homage to Him. It
means to tell others about Him. I honor Him by teaching about Him, and bringing
others to Him.
All those who are the
covenant people of the Lord will choose to honor Him on the Sabbath day. It is
a pure choice. There is no coercion either way. The world will make it very
easy to find your own pleasure on His holy day, and yet it is just as easy to
take the day off and seek the Lord one day per week.
Blessings and Curses
Whether I am cursed or
blessed depends upon my decisions. God does not curse me, rather I choose to be
tied to the world by choosing the things of the world. The blessing is the
offer of more. I can choose to give up the desires of the flesh for the blessings
of eternity. There is no grey area, the choice is clear, it is one or the
other.
These choices are given as
one is deciding to be a Christian. Prior to this moment of decision, there is
no option, however after one has a covenant with the Lord, then the tests come
to allow the choice to be made. The Lord will give every Christian a choice. He
asks us to choose Him, but we have full agency to choose what we want. There is
a space granted for repentance, making a choice does not mean it is forever.
The man who took the job at the expense of his family was able to repent and
choose his family. He realized that he made the wrong choice. Perhaps my
patient who left his wife and daughter will repent.
If I choose a blessing it
is by denying the things of the flesh. The choice is accepting what I’m offered
or rejecting it in favor of the things of God. I desire both, so I choose which
is the greater desire, that thing of the world, or the things of God. It’s not
obvious, my choice is based on which way I lean.
But, O my people, beware lest there shall arise contentions
among you, and ye list to obey the evil spirit, which was spoken of by my
father Mosiah. For behold, there is a wo pronounced upon him who listeth to
obey that spirit; for if he listeth to obey him, and remaineth and dieth in his
sins, the same drinketh damnation to his own soul; for he receiveth for his
wages an everlasting punishment, having transgressed the law of God contrary to
his own knowledge.
(Mosiah
2:32-33)
And in one year were thousands and tens of thousands of souls
sent to the eternal world, that they might reap their rewards according to
their works, whether they were good or whether they were bad, to reap eternal
happiness or eternal misery, according to the spirit which they listed to obey,
whether it be a good spirit or a bad one. For every man receiveth wages of him
whom he listeth to obey, and this according to the words of the spirit of
prophecy; therefore let it be according to the truth.
(Alma
3:26-27)
It's just a leaning. It's not obvious. I list to one side and make that choice, which leads me to one side, or the other. I can speak the words of the prophets, but my leaning is what I do.
Not everyone has every choice available to them. Some people are bitter
that they never find satisfaction in the things of the world, either because
they don’t receive them, or because they get them but don’t find them
satisfying. I never got some things I wanted in life, but it was because I
chose not to take them. They were offered to me, but I denied them because I
knew the will of the Lord and decided to follow Him. Other things I accepted
against the will of the Lord, and found no satisfaction in them. They became a
curse, or a loss. Sometimes the things of the world are not offered, or not
available.
God respects agency more
than anything. Agency is above all. If I am going to be with Him, it must come
by my own freewill choice. There is no shadow of coercion in either direction.
As choices are presented to me, I have complete freedom to choose either. I am
not bound. I choose what I want.
Wherefore, the Lord God gave unto man that he should act for
himself. Wherefore, man could not act for himself save it should be that he was
enticed by the one or the other.
(2
Nephi 2:16)
I want both. I want the
things of God, and I want the things of the world. Some people think they can have both by asking God to give them what they want of the world. This is
“asking amiss.”
Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may
consume it upon your lusts.
(James
4:3)
Receiving the things of
God means sacrificing the things of the world. That is the choice of life. God gives everyone absolute freedom to choose, which is one of the reasons we are here on the earth. Abraham was told our purpose for being here:
And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them;
(Abraham 3:25)
It is by my choices that I am going in a direction. I am given commandments of the Lord, and I am offered the things of the world -- I choose the Lord!
