An Eternal Family

The senses of our bodies are one- or two-dimensional; we perceive only what is in front of us at the moment. The brain is really only one-dimensional because we can only have one thought at a time. Because of this, our ideas, concepts, and philosophies are severely limited. Our brains cannot conceive of anything that it has not experienced. We are really, really limited, even handicapped by our own perceptions.

One consequence of this is to limit our relationships of family. Our worldly concept of family is a mother, father and their children. This is a very fixed idea from childhood that doesn't allow for substitutes. We even have to work up to the concept of adoption, and we accept that as a second-class "family." Those who have children who are adopted know the difference. Children who are adopted also feel the difference. Step-parents, step-children, or step-siblings are also second-class. I feel that this is very short-sighted, and the true concept of family is not at all that narrow. One passage of Scripture may help illustrate. Jesus is speaking to a group of disciples:

"While he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and his brethren stood without, desiring to speak with him. Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee. But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren? And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother." (Matthew 12:46-50)

I believe in this passage Jesus is expanding our perception of family. On the Earth we are limited to a mother, a father, and their children as a family, however in Heaven that limitation doesn't exist. As Jesus indicated, I believe we choose our family, and the connections are not limited to a few, but rather have multiple dimensions.

The key to all of life is choice. Our ability to choose is the single most important foundation upon which all life is based. Without choice there is no life because there is no difference, all is the same, which is nothing. Our next-door neighbor had a birthday last week, and his son, Max, wrote him a birthday card saying, in essence: "If you weren't my dad, I would search until I found you..." Did we choose our families? Were we given the choice of a mother and father? Some people think not, and are angry that they were "sent" to a family that didn't care for them. Max, on the other hand, said he would choose his father all over again. Perhaps we didn't choose to be born into a family, but as we go through life we choose our fathers, mothers, sisters, and brothers.

A father is a man who engenders life in another. Life is growth, so, anyone who helps us to grow is our parent. Once we are grown enough to make these choices, we begin choosing our family. Those we associate with are our brothers and sisters. Those who help us to grow are our mothers and fathers.

Anyone who would like to be a father simply needs to grow up and help others to do the same. Becoming a mentor, teacher, writer, speaker, or in any way giving information to help others to grow makes us worthy to be a father to another. The human tendency to push others to be better doesn't work; only by helping others to come to where we are can we become a father or mother to them. They may go beyond us, but in order to do it they will need to find another parent to teach them how.

Thus, the true concept of family is very different than a mother, a father, and their children. In the Eternal sense, we have the fathers we choose. Jesus explained this to the Pharisees:

"They answered and said unto him, Abraham is our father. Jesus saith unto them, If ye were Abraham's children, ye would do the works of Abraham. But now ye seek to kill me, a man that hath told you the truth, which I have heard of God: this did not Abraham. Ye do the deeds of your father. Then said they to him, We be not born of fornication; we have one Father, even God. Jesus said unto them, If God were your Father, ye would love me: for I proceeded forth and came from God; neither came I of myself, but he sent me. Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word. Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it." (John 8:39-44)

In other words, those born physically into the family of Abraham are not his children, but rather those who follow him, who do as he did. If God were their father they would do as He does and love Jesus. Jesus then tells them who their father really is, the one they follow. This is true of all fathers -- birth is not the issue. All of those we follow are our fathers. If we choose to follow people who are destructive then these are our fathers. On the other hand, if we choose to follow Jesus Christ, or any of His disciples, then these are our fathers -- all of them.

The Eternal concept of family, then, is bringing others to God. When we are all with God, our associations as parents and siblings have a hierarchy. Those who help the most people come to know God, and return to His presence have the greatest glory, indeed, they are at the top. The holy prophets whose writings we use to come to know our Father in Heaven and His Son, Jesus Christ, are fathers to many. Each of us can choose to be great and have glory by helping others come to know God.

Ultimately, Jesus Christ is a Father to all because it is only through Him that we can have life in every way, both immortality and Eternal Life. The first is given in spite of our choices so He is the Father of every resurrected, perfect, immortal body -- we will all follow Him into death and resurrection. The second, however, is a gift only to those who choose to accept it. For these, Christ is the Father of their Eternal family. Not everyone will follow Him to Heaven because we all have choice, and some choose other fathers of their eternal existence. He is the Father of all the Earth, every person ever born to the family of Adam, making Him the greatest of all. He is also necessarily the Father of all those who choose Him, making Him the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven, the Servant of all.

The true concept of family in Heaven, then, is based on a choice each makes to come to God. Those who bring others to know the choice is possible, as well as those who help others to make choices, and keep covenants are the fathers and mothers, while those who end up in the same place by making the same choices are brothers and sisters.

Our "reward" in Heaven may be the people we bring to God. We are building our mansions in Heaven by helping others come to know God in any way. The more followers, or children, we engender spiritually, the larger our "house" will be. The real work of life, then, is to come to know God ourselves by choosing "parents" who know God, and then to assist as many people as we can to do the same by becoming a mentor or teacher to them. This is the process of building our Eternal family.

Dad

Last week my dad came and spent a couple of days with me. It was just the two of us, except when Charlotte was there in the evening. He came to work with me, went to one of my "dinner talks" and hung out. While I was working, he was reading a book about the beginning of time: Adam, Eve, Seth, Cain, Able, and so forth. We talked a little about these things and I was surprised at his understanding. He's now almost 80 years old, but he's still working! He's running a MLM business and helping Frank remodel his kitchen. He's also in business with a friend on a new type of human resources business. He's busy. But I still noticed he's slowing down a little. We had a good time together.

Today I woke up with a song in my head, The Leader of the Band, by Dan Fogelberg. I heard it a lot when I started college at BYU in 1980 because my roommate had the album and listened to it frequently on his record player. While I was in the shower this morning it occurred to me that the song was about me and my dad, suddenly my eyes were opened to who I was and I started crying.

"The leader of the band is tired, and his eyes are growing old,

But his blood runs through my instruments and his song is in my soul,

My life has been a poor attempt to imitate the man

I'm just a living legacy to the Leader of the Band!"

I suddenly saw my dad as the leader of our little band of boys. He did the best he could with everything. He was a great man, a great father. He could do anything, we thought, and he instilled in us the same sense. He had faith, even when he didn't understand. He was persistent, never becoming discouraged, even through many difficult times. He just kept on plugging away at everything until he accomplished his goal. He loved his family. He loved his boys. He spent time with us, taking us Boy Scout and family trips.

 

I am amazed at how much my life has paralleled his. Family, marriage, problems, health issues, activities and so forth that I do or have are similar to what his has done. I have the same mannerisms, speech, and ideas -- in spite of how much I would like to believe otherwise. I tell the same jokes to my kids. I learned to build because he did. I have a song for everything anybody says -- and start singing it. I find myself saying the same things. I was a Boy Scout leader for my boys, and others.

I really have built upon the foundation provided by my dad. In my career I have written books and articles saying some of the same things my dad used to tell us when we were kids. For example, he would frequently tell us how sugar was "poison," as he would eat it. Of course, we laughed at his hypocrisy, adolescents are very aware of that. Recently I wrote an article on the internet explaining how sugar is the toxin that causes the most illness in the world -- and I still eat it (at times)! I took what he gave me, and ran with it. I took on his dreams, and improved on them. I took his ideas of success, and made them successful. "His song is in my soul!" I am what he wanted to be, in so many ways.

The Spirit of Elijah has wrought heavily on me, my heart is turned to my father. I have a new love for my dad. In the past I have seen him as so different from me, but now my eyes have been opened to the similarities that I couldn't see before. I always wanted to connect with him, and didn't think I could. On the one hand, I can now appreciate all that he has done for me. He gave me life. He raised me up. He trained me. But more than all of that, he gave me dreams, goals, and faith to move ahead, to go on, to improve on what he had done. My dreams are his dreams. I know who I am. "I am a living legacy to the leader of the band!"

The Prophet

I feel the need to write about a remarkable man who has made a difference in my life, and in the life of every person living and dead. It was said of him, after he was killed, that he "has done more, save Jesus only, for the salvation of men in this world, than any other man that ever lived in it." (D&C 135:3) I took that with a grain of salt for many years, not really understanding what it meant. I thought it may be an exaggeration, a little hyperbole written by his cohorts to emphasize how much they thought of him. I thought, "Really? To put him at the level of Jesus Christ? Above Moses and Abraham, Peter and Paul?" Actually, I don't think even the authors fully understood how true that statement really is.

People have filled the world for thousands of years. Prophets have come and taught about our Creator, God, while others have taught about false gods. False gods are generally concerned with what we can see, hear, feel, and know through our senses, while the true God gives knowledge about higher things that are not of this world. Sacrifices of what we know and think are required in order for us to receive the greater knowledge. Prophets have all taught these things, but there is one that stands out more than all the others.

Joseph Smith was only a boy like any other in a rural community in New York in the early 1800's. He was looking for truth, like almost everyone else. He had no special gifts or talents. His family were poor farmers, living off the land through hard work. But what he accomplished in only twenty years is astounding!

When Jesus walked the Earth in Palestine, He organized a church with apostles and prophets who were commanded to "Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you." (Matthew 28:19-20) Peter, Paul, and the Apostles of that time tried, but were all killed before they could fulfill that commandment. Since that time Christians have generally tried to bring this knowledge to others, but much of it was lost.

The ancient Church of Jesus Christ taught concepts that were subsequently lost when the Apostles were killed. The scriptures were there, but there was nobody who could interpret them. People were "tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive. (Ephesians 4:14) And deceive they did.

The most important information was lost entirely -- the knowledge of the purpose of life. For almost two thousand years nobody knew why we existed, where we came from, or what happened after this life. There were all kinds of theories, ideas, and philosophies, but nobody really knew for sure, until Joseph Smith.

While translating the Bible into English, Joseph saw that much was missing from the original manuscript of the writings of Moses. One particular scripture is foundational, the most concise answer to all the "why" questions of life, that reveals God's goal for all of His children. In it, God is talking to Moses on the mountain, and tell him about the purpose of life,

"For behold, this is my work and my glory -- to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." (Moses 1:39)

This statement is simple and concise, yet most profound and glorious! God has two purposes for man:

1. To make him immortal, and

2. To give him Eternal Life.

All religions and philosophies, before Joseph Smith, believed that these two terms were synonymous, and most still do. However, nothing could be further from the truth. Eternal Life is continually growing, learning, achieving, and improving. Immortality only means to continue to exist forever. Immortality is a gift given to everyone by Jesus Christ, but Eternal Life must be learned. It is something we grow into as we fulfill our purpose of life.

If you go to any school, philosophy, church, or religion in the world, and if they believe that life is forever, they will have some concept of heaven and hell. If you are good you go to heaven, and if you are bad you go to hell. In some cases all are going to hell, in others, all are going to heaven. The truth is so much more wonderful than any conception of man. Jesus said, "In my Father's house are many mansions..." (John 14:2) God is so merciful that He has created a Heaven for everyone who desires it. While Paul briefly describes in 1 Corinthians chapter 15 the various glories in the resurrection, Joseph Smith gives us details as to what they are, who goes to each, and how to receive our desires in D&C section 76. There he also revealed the meaning of "the third heaven" that Paul talks about in 2 Corinthians 12:2.

All growth or improvement requires the following:

1. A goal

2. A plan

3. A commitment

4. A sacrifice

Before Joseph Smith people didn't know where they were going -- they had no goal so they couldn't even begin the process of growth. The best they could do was to live a moral life in order to receive a higher glory than those who were mean and selfish. Thus, all religions and philosophies were on the same level. Because of Joseph Smith, however, we know what God has prepared for His children -- His goal for us. For the first time in almost two thousand years there is a real goal.

After having a goal, there must be a plan to obtain it. If you want to learn to play the piano, just saying you are going to play it is not enough, you need a plan. This must be a true plan. Sitting and listening to Beethoven all day is not going to make you proficient in playing it, you must actually sit down with an instructor and pound on the keys. In the same sense, every goal must have a true plan, or it will not be reached. Only through Joseph Smith can we know the true plan, the straight and narrow path, that can bring us Eternal Life. All other plans cannot bring us to reach our full potential.

Also, it was through Joseph Smith that the authority to administer the plan was given. Authority is essential in every organization. Without authority there is no organization, and all turns to chaos. The police have authority to write tickets to those who break traffic laws -- it would not be good if anybody could collect fines for infractions of the law. Parents have authority over their children, and nobody else can discipline them without being authorized by the parents. Likewise in the Church of Jesus Christ the authority is given to preach the Gospel and administer the ordinances, which are the commitments we make to God to carry-out the plan. This allows us to be coached on the path, making all the sacrifices needed to receive Eternal Life.

Moreover, Joseph Smith didn't just affect people in his own day, his influence is generational, from the beginning to the end of the world. There have been billions of people who have lived without the ordinances of salvation. In order to enter into "the third heaven" and receive eternal life it is essential that each receive the ordinances. Through the Prophet learn how we are able to help those who went before without a knowledge of the plan by performing these ordinances vicariously for them. Thus, all who ever lived on the Earth will have the opportunity to achieve the highest glory, to fulfill their purpose for existence, and receive "the greatest of all the gifts of God." (D&C 14:7)

In short, Joseph Smith, in his short life, did more for the salvation of mankind, besides the Author of salvation Himself, than anyone else.

1. He brought a knowledge of the purpose of mankind, and the reasons for our existence on the Earth -- our goal.

2. He revealed the entire plan of happiness, the fullness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

3. He brought the covenants and ordinances, or commitments, that allow us to follow the plan.

4. He organized a church to administer the ordinances and help people carry-out the plan.

5. He prepared the way for all those who lived before to receive the same covenants and ordinances.

Through this man we have the ability to fulfill the purpose for our existence, that of Eternal Life. And not just we, but every person who ever lived has this same opportunity.

Thus, to say that Joseph Smith was a prophet is to belittle his profound contribution to mankind. No other prophet has such a direct effect on the eternal salvation of every son and daughter of Adam. While other prophets revealed truths about God to their own generation and those that followed, the things revealed by Joseph Smith have an immediate effect on all of mankind. The personal salvation of most people, and every family is dependent on the knowledge, ordinances, and authority given through him. Indeed, your own salvation, or your ability to reach your full potential, is dependent on him.