“Perhaps I am meant to swim in deep waters.... better deep than shallow!”
― Joseph Smith Jr.
In the early Church there was a great deal of persecution. Christians were hated, beaten, tortured, hunted and imprisoned, and even killed. Why would the Lord allow His people to be treated in such a manner? Of course, for their benefit! When people face persecution they must of necessity make a decision: "Am I in, or am I out?" This decision is essential to being a Christian. Each person who wants to be part of the Church of the Firstborn must make the decision to be in all the way, of his own free will and choice. Persecution forces that decision immediately. The willingness to endure all manner of pain and loss, even the peril of life, puts you all the way in the Church -- you must swim in deep water.
"In the fall of 1857, the nineteen-year-old Joseph F. was returning from his mission in Hawaii, and in California he joined a wagon train. It was a volatile time for the Saints. Johnston’s Army was marching towards Utah, and many had bitter feelings towards the Church. One evening several hoodlums rode into camp, cursing and threatening to hurt every Mormon they could find. Most in the wagon train ran and hid in the brush. But Joseph F. thought to himself: “Shall I run from these fellows? Why should I fear them?” With that, he walked up to one of the intruders who, with pistol in hand, demanded, “Are you a Mormon?” Joseph F. Smith responded, “Yes siree; dyed in the wool; true blue, through and through.” At that, the hoodlum grasped his hand and said, “Well you are the [blankety-blank] pleasantest man I ever met! Shake hands, young fellow. I am glad to see a man that stands up for his convictions”' (See Gospel Doctrine, 518).
If the Church is a pool, then all those who are baptized are swimming in it, some in the shallow end, and others, like Joseph F. Smith, in the deep end. There were many who chose the world when faced with the decision, getting out of the pool entirely, rather than risk their lives. Some of these became the greatest persecutors of those who stayed in. When they got out of the pool, they got all the way out!
Today, there is little, if any, persecution of the Saints. For this reason all those who profess to be Christian could be wading in the shallow water at whatever level. It's easy because there is nobody requiring that they go all the way in. They may appear to be in by all outside indicators: they go to church, participate in service projects, pay tithing, and so forth. It appears that they keep the commandments of God. They're in the pool. However, their hearts are not necessarily changed. They may have designs on the things of the world, and be filled with lust, greed, envy, and all manner of lasciviousness. They still live "in the world, but also of the world" on the inside. They have excuses for not keeping the Sabbath Day holy such as, "I need to work and support my family!" They trust in their own strength, or in their wealth, or their family. Their feet are firmly planted on the bottom of the shallow end of the pool.
I know about this because it's the way I have lived for 50 years! Wading in shallow water. Appearing to be very much dedicated to God on the outside, but filled with the world in my heart. I have desired the things of the world more than the things of God, with all the normal lusts of the flesh: money, pleasures, and the honors of men. My desires are well-hidden because, as usual, I'm smarter than others; I'm still in the shallow end, but sitting on the bottom with only my head out of the water so I appear to be in deep water.
I'm ready to move on, to swim in the deep end. I don't want to stay in the shallow end all my life. I need to take the risk and give my all to the Lord, to follow Him into the depths of humility (pun intended) and give Him my whole heart. Giving up the shallow water means giving up the support of the world. This could be anything we have that we rely on for support: money, lands, houses, friends, family, talents, and so forth. Swimming out into the deep water without a floatie or any means of support takes a great deal of faith. I want to give him all, not holding anything back, putting my trust fully in Him to be my support as I go out into the deep and start to swim.
I will obey every word of God. I will do anything. I will suffer any discomfort, or persecution. I'm willing to make that decision. I will take the bullet. I will walk the walk. I will suffer ridicule and pain. I would make the sacrifice, and give all to Him, gladly, willingly, and swim out into the deep water of my own accord.
The problem for me is, I don't have the advantage of diving, or getting pushed, into the deep end of the pool from the beginning; I got in a little at a time, getting my toes wet, then up to my ankles, then up to my knees, and so forth. Now I'm ready to move in to the deep end, but I don't know how to swim! I have to make decisions and willingly and voluntarily go all the way. I need to give up my worldliness -- all of it! ...But, there is no obvious choice. I'm not threatened in any way. I'm not being pushed. I don't have to walk away from all my belongings, family, business, and things of the world. I can keep everything so I don't know what to keep, and what to give up.
It's easy when everything is taken from us, losing our means of support. We don't have a choice -- we just accept the will of God and do all we can. But, the big question is, how do you sacrifice when it isn't forced on you? Walking away from all your responsibilities, the job, earning money, supporting your family, employing others so they can support their families, and whatever else we do is not necessarily the sacrifice we need to make. Do we willingly give up family, friends, food, music, money, or anything else of the world? How do we know? Does it mean quitting work to be homeless on skid row? Do I move to Timbuktu and start a mission? How is one to know what sacrifice to make? Where is the deep end, really?
"And as for the perils which I am called to pass through, they seem but a small thing to me, as the envy and wrath of man have been my common lot all the days of my life... nevertheless, deep water is what I am wont to swim in. It all has become a second nature to me; and I feel, like Paul, to glory in tribulation; for to this day has the God of my fathers delivered me out of them all, and will deliver me from henceforth..." Joseph Smith
The Lord will guide. Everyone is different so we should ask Him what is needed. He is faithful to answer every prayer. Blessings may be hard. We may be forced to make decisions, to choose between the things we want in the world, and the things of God. It's the everyday choices to pray, read the Scriptures, love others, and do good. It's found in small things, not necessarily in big sacrifices. We may not be asked to walk away from all our worldly belongings, or face the business end of a gun. Sometimes staying and improving our current situation, or helping others where we are is the deep water in which we must swim. God knows. He is the swimming instructor. He is the lifeguard. He has all the floaties! He won't let us drown. With His help, we can learn to swim in deep water.
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