Joy and Gratitude

Dr. Berne Brown, a sociologist, in interviewing thousands of people noticed a pattern in the relationship between gratitude and joy, "Every one of the joyful people I talked to had a deep sense of gratitude, not just expressing thanks, but living it." Of course, the next recommendation for those who desire to have joy is to develop "an attitude of gratitude" which would then allow them to feel joy. However, this is not the way to find joy.

I like

For a person to make a conscious decision to be grateful he will express thanks for what he likes. "For the beauty of the Earth, For the beauty of the skies; For the love which from our birth, Over and around us lies..." The things we enjoy, that give us pleasure, that excite our minds and bodies, that we consider to be good are the things for which we can easily feel grateful. It's all about me. It's all about what I like. This form of gratitude is selfish, and not joyful, because it doesn't include love, which is completely unselfish.

Academic exercises

If a person has no love and wants to "develop an attitude of gratitude" he must begin expressing thanks for things he doesn't even like, but without knowing why. This is an academic exercise that does not include the heart. Corrie Ten Boom talks about expressing thanks for the fleas in the prison during World War II. However, until she knew why, it was only an academic exercise. When she found out that the guards of the prison didn't come and rape them because they had so many fleas they were very grateful -- for the fleas.

However, True, heartfelt gratitude only comes from knowing the truth that all I have is an expression of the love of God. Until I understand this concept, gratitude can only be two-dimensional. It has to be selfish because it is all about me and what I like. I can only be grateful for the things that benefit me. The "attitude of gratitude" is childish and selfish because I don't know who to thank. The difference is not academic, it is the difference between night and day. If Corrie Ten Boom is grateful for fleas in general it only has two dimensions, however when the dimension of love is added it fills the heart. She knows it is a blessing from a loving God who is protecting and nurturing her personally and constantly. She is grateful, not for the fleas, but to her loving Heavenly Father for His protection.

True Love

The basis for this type of gratitude comes from a knowledge and understanding of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Knowing the reality of my lost and fallen state, and knowing that there is no way I could ever get out alive; knowing I am doomed to suffer the consequences of my bad choices forever without Him changes my heart. Understanding His sacrifice for my benefit gives me the perspective to truly feel gratitude in my heart. It is the knowledge of His love to "snatch us from our awful, sinful, and polluted state" (Alma 26:17) that really forms the foundation of gratitude.

With a foundation of faith in Christ I can truly have a heartfelt gratitude for everything, even the things I don't personally like. I know that His love is supernal and will take me to places I don't want to go for my benefit. I know "He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life..." (2 Nephi 26:24) When I am called to pass through sorrow, when I am in pain, when I have to suffer and grieve, I can have the comfort of knowing His love, acceptance, and ultimate deliverance. I can truly be grateful in my heart for all things. This is not an "attitude of gratitude" but rather a deep and abiding knowledge that brings an overwhelming sense of gratitude for everything. I know to whom I am grateful, and why! This is true gratitude -- and joy!